The ESSWE4 Conference: A Rogue Undergrad in Sweden!

You would have to be living under a rock to not have noticed that I’ve been talking a lot about the ESSWE4 conference in Gothenburg. Now that the conference is over, I wanted to share my thoughts and experiences about what is undoubtedly the premier gathering of Esoteric Scholars OF ALL TIME.

I’ll be unpacking the conference over the next few posts, but today I wanted to give an overview of Sweden before we get into the conference proper. After all, ESSWE4 spread itself out over four days, and the best way to get it all out there is to do likewise, myself.

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Welcome to Finland

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I never go on vacation, so I scrimped on my flight. In the end, it took me around 24 hours to get from my house to Gothenburg—via London and Helsinki, Finland. The Finland leg of my journey was the most adventurous, partly because I never, ever in the history of ever thought I would ever (notice a pattern?) go to Finland. Second, The Husband and I were called out on the loudspeaker for being late for boarding. Let’s just say the “Wheelie family” got a lot of dirty looks when they got on the plane. I’d apologize, but we didn’t leave the gate for at least another half hour. So Finland, you need to chill the fuck out.

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Park Avenue

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If I saved on my flight, I splurged on my hotel: The Elite Park Avenue. Located within walking distance to everything on Gothenburg’s main strip, it was well worth the price. For fuck’s sake, they even sent us up some champagne. ¡Muy bueno!

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champagne

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The primo location meant never having to use public transit. Those of you who follow me on Twitter know that I spend a lot of time on the TTC, and it’s not always a pleasant experience. It was quite a relief to not have to worry about that!

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In Toronot, you get mad at the Streetcar, in Sweden, the Street car gets mad at YOU!
In Toronto, you get angry at the streetcar. In Sweden, the streetcar gets angry at YOU!

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Gothenburg is a small city; everything’s within walking distance. (Walking distance being defined as under 30 minutes. I’m a city gal, remember?). However, despite having amazingly clean air and gloriously old buildings, I was surprised by the amount of graffiti. Especially since Scandinavia is all about order and law-abidingness.

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Illuminati Bears
Illuminati bears are watching!

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phallic art
Phallic fertility art.

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I’m going to say something now which will no doubt offend many Swedes: Sweden, you have awful coffee. It’s true. The coffee in Sweden tastes like instant coffee mixed with ass. It was so awful, The Husband dragged me on an epic walk to find the only Starbucks in Gothenburg. Ironically, this was hands-down the best coffee I had in Sweden.

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All hail our corporate coffee overlords!
All hail our corporate coffee overlords!

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But the buildings were, as already mentioned, beautiful. OMG, look at these beautiful buildings!

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old building

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old building 2

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In my next post (that’s not MMM!), I’ll take you with as I venture to Gothenburg University for Day 1 of the ESSWE4 conference. Oh the suspense!

Read all my posts on the ESSWE Conference here.

4 thoughts on “The ESSWE4 Conference: A Rogue Undergrad in Sweden!
  1. Building up, eh? Found a whole lot of other Illuminati-themed graffiti in Gothenburg, confirming suspicions that esoteric conspiracy is hot with the kids (and the hipsters).

    Looking forward to the rest.

  2. Illuminati conspiracies are nothing. I wish someone would tell me why pickle-relish-mayonaise is so popular in Gothenburg. Surely, it’s a tool of control by our reptilian overlords.

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